Mardi Gras, king cake and disappointment

This coming week we will be celebrating Mardi Gras parties for the first time at Annunciation Catholic Academy.  We normally have Valentine’s parties in February, but Valentine’s Day falls during the first week of Lent—not a good time for parties to my way of thinking.  Trying not to eliminate one of only three parties we have all year, I thought we would give Mardi Gras parties a try this year.

While many associate Mardi Gras with New Orleans and certain excesses, the tradition actually goes back centuries and was brought to these shores by French settlers.  The term “mardi gras” means “fat Tuesday” and refers to the celebrations in which many indulged right before Ash Wednesday.  Carnival atmosphere and the eating of sweets was often the lead up to the somber time of prayer, fasting and abstinence which characterize Lent.

One of the traditions associated with Mardi Gras in this country is the king cake.  This is a cinnamon-roll like cake inside, with sugary icing and traditional Mardi Gras colored sprinkles on the outside.  Inside the cake is a baby.  Getting the piece of cake which contains the baby is considered special. 

Some interesting conversations have evolved around having a king cake at our parties.  Some of the parents preparing the parties planned on making individual cupcakes instead of the traditional large cinnamon-roll type cake.  They wanted each child to get a baby.  They did not want any child to be disappointed.  As an educator I objected.  Not only would this not be true to the tradition of the king cake, it would also be a lost opportunity to teach our children that you do not always get everything you want in life.  I would much prefer to have a child learn how to deal with disappointments by not getting the baby in a king cake than to have his/her first disappointment come when he/she is not able to have or do something truly significant.  We do our children a disservice when we shelter them too much.  Instead of teaching them that they can have everything they want any time they want it, we need to be showing them that we will love them and support them even when things do not go exactly as they would like. 

I am glad we are introducing the children to Mardi Gras, and I can't wait to have a piece of king cake.  It is a great prelude to Lent, one of the most significant times of the liturgical year.